It’s time to admit it, my secret shame. It’s Jeremy Kyle. There, I’ve said it so bring on your scorn and derision, I don’t care!
I started to watch Jeremy Kyle every now and again when I was home sick, or on leave during the week. I thought it was funny and daft, a way to see how the “other half live” I suppose. But since seeing it was available to watch on the catch up service I’ve been watching it every night whilst having my tea. I don’t know what it is about Jeremy but I like his unveiled hatred for a lot of his guests and he says things to people that I wish sometimes we all could say. He gets so angry with benefit cheats and layabouts and addicts that choose drugs and alcohol over their own children. He screams at people who decide to have kids when they’ve been in dysfunctional relationships for 5 minutes. But he’ll admit when he’s wrong about someone which a lot of us should do really.
He has some catchphrases that I like, my favourite being “Well well well” when reading out lie detector results. I use it a lot now, I think it’s a great precursor when starting any conversation. Then there’s “You should have put something on the end of it!” which is usually shouted at some useless teenage parents. And don’t let me forget “Get a job!”.
The guests on the show are usually teenagers that have had kids who don’t know who the father is so are there for a DNA test. Or people in ridiculous relationships who don’t trust each other to go down the shops on their own without shacking up with someone. They’re mostly unemployed and claiming benefits and buying drugs at the expense of the tax payers. And they’re stupid. Not just a little bit dim, they’re completely devoid of intelligence and would barely be classed as life if they were found on a Petri dish. I don’t how these people actually function!
On the surface it’s salacious and exciting, laughing at these stupid people and they’re pathetic lives, getting to feel superior to them and how they live; it’s acceptable voyeurism. But if you watch it enough you get to see something deeper and more troubling, a great piece of social commentary. It’s so sad to see kids having kids. 15-16 year old girls who’ve had children and they don’t know who the father is. Isn’t that a cause for concern? Shouldn’t schools be doing something more to teach them how to not get pregnant, or have an ambition other than being a mum and living off benefits until they become grandparents at 30? Now that Nadine Dorries has had her “sex abstinence” bill passed I guess this will only get worse. The girls don’t want to say no. You can see they think nothing of sex, it’s just something to do and it means nothing. And why does the onus have to be placed on the girls? Why not try to educate the boys about contraception more so they don’t think using condoms are for losers? Just say no is a stupid idea that hasn’t worked, ever, for ANYTHING!
Then there’s people who’ve been degraded by people they thought they could trust. Lives destroyed by lies. Feuds between friends and families played out for all to see. I saw an episode recently which surrounded a family torn apart by a father who suspected his own daughter of stealing his life savings from his wardrobe (yes really). He screamed such hateful things at her because he was convinced of her guilt. The lie detector test showed that she was innocent but she was devastated at being accused and humiliated on national telly by her own dad. How can a family get like that? How can it have gotten so far?
No one seems to talk to each other any more, preferring to have slanging matches in front of millions of people, or on Jeremy’s pet peeve “social networking sites”, rather than at home in private. I’m to blame too though, for watching it. I don’t know how Jeremy doesn’t go insane, some guests make my head hurt!
I hope I never have to be a guest on the show…but if I was I’d make sure to wear my bestest tracksuit, bleach my hair yellow (making sure to leave an inch or 2 of dark roots), wear ALL my jewellery and tan myself orange. You know I’d look “fit”!